Contentment for myself didn’t come easy. I loved looking ahead, looking forward to what’s coming next, getting excited about the future and all the desires that the Lord has promised to fulfill, all the really really good stuff. So much so that day to day life use to seem mundane, use to feel so repetitive that I was almost missing the every day simple miracles the Lord was placing in front of me. Wow Abba, I am so sorry.
God shows me a lot of patience and attention whenever my mind wanders to the next season. It’s really kind of Him. I was listening to this banger of a song the other day and there was a part of the song that wrecked me, “A King that paints beauty with time.” In that moment, my Abba fell to HIS knees at MY feet and asked me to weep with Him at the beauty of all of my tomorrows while still learning from all of my todays.
The King of Kings. The I Am. He knelt at my feet and asked me to be with him in my today, and I have never once been deserving of that. I have never once earned that right, and still He gives Himself to me as my groom daily, even when I forget to put on my veil some mornings as His bride.
“I want all of you today, MacKenzie.” Sometimes Papa’s whispers terrify every chill in my body. How amazing is that? He wants all of me, today. Whether I’m tired, weary, doubtful or sometimes even running away, He still falls at my feet and begs me to stay a while.
A King that paints beauty with time. He doesn’t rush through today to get to His tomorrow. He purposely plans our every moment, and He calls me to live in that moment. The desires of my heart will be fulfilled, but on His timing, when I’m ready to receive them. Being an author, a mother, and a wife will happen. Being a coach, an aunt and having roots will happen. And He wants to be excited with me in those moments!!!!! But He also doesn’t want me to get so wrapped up in the waiting for those things that I miss out on all the things He wants to give me that I haven’t even thought of yet.
How tender, how patient and how attentive is He with His daughter. I can not say thank you enough for all the things. I am so deeply in love with Him. I am so madly in love with His gaze that He is the only thing I want right now. He is the only thing I want to think about in my todays. My feet are planted in Costa Rica and yet my eyes are so fixated on Him that it makes the beautiful beaches seem dull in comparison.
I have no fricken clue where Papa will call me next, I have no idea what tomorrow holds, who I’ll marry, what career i’ll decide or even where I’m moving next; but what I do know is whatever it is, it will be the most beautiful life because the trust I have in His plan is the trust that a newborn has in their mother; total and utter reliance.
Wow, thanks God.
xoxo,
Kenz
I love this so much. The intimacy you have with the Father is so evident on your life, Kenze. I am SO thankful to God that he chose you to pour into this squad. How blessed we are.
woah!!! these words that God gave you carry weight! thank you for being obedient & sharing them from your heart!!
begs me to stay awhile!!! wow! that kinda love will make me weep!
kenz, i admire you! i have a lot of love in my heart for you. you inspire. you fight hard. you are brave. praying rest over you!!! He sees you!!!
yeah, i cant wait until our paths cross again
Kenz, What powerful insight you bring! thank you for sharing this.
DUDE! What the heck! If I weren’t in the middle of my class in public right now I’d be bawling! The way you wove your unique intimacy you have with the Father into this short but sweet post is incredible. I read this twice, purely because it spoke so clearly. That line about the bride and veil WRECKED me, and the LAST line too oh my gosh. I love you, thank you for sharing this!
You and your WORDS! Forever proud to know and be known by you.